Can you guys give me advice?

I'm from philipines and I'm not good enough in English/grammar hehehhee... I need advice about future...im 17 years old overthink to much not smart enough and I'm aware of it watching videos motivation etc...in YouTube but I feel they don't feet my point what I feel.....I have insecurities,.....toooo shy, weak communication,anxiety and scared of social interaction but I try to overcome by trying approach someone,,but they ignored me sometimes, now I feel hesitate to approach someone....and my mom keep yelling at me even small mistake and embarrassing me in front of my neighbors and that's why I keep crying alone and not go outside because my anxiety...and it make me introvert I feel I'm deferent because in school I'm only the one is so quiet I'm a kind,but I'm scared what happened to me, when I'm 15 years old my classmates take advantage of me because I'm to kind and that's why I keep quiet and insecure right now.....and pressured about future because I'm older brother and not good social communication, and I feel I'm dumb I feel people keep taking advantage of me because my face is innocent and I'm scared to go outside I will be judged with my neighbor.... I HATE THIS LIFE!!!!!!!!!!