I'm seeing a lot of posts about creepy DMs that women get: here's my honest take.

First of all, yes. Its creepy. Its wrong. Its unsolicited and completely uncivilized. This is a clear indication of the mentality of certain men and nobody could agree more that it hurts in ways they can't comprehend.

Second, the number of posts seen on this subreddit is a clear indication that no matter how much you try to expose them, they're going to continue doing what they do. Now does that mean you stop posting about them? No. Everyone has the power to say what they feel.

If a woman posts publicly, that is not an invitation to cross boundaries. Visibility is not consent. Being online is not consent. Existing as a woman in a public space is not consent. A lot of men seriously need to understand that attention is not flattering when it is invasive, pushy, sexual, or clearly unwanted.

And this is exactly where men need to be better. Not just by saying "well I’m not like that", but by actually understanding why this keeps happening so often that women have to constantly guard themselves. Read the room. Respect boundaries. Stop treating every interaction like an opening. Stop hiding behind "I was just trying" when what you were really doing was making someone uncomfortable and forcing them to manage your behavior.

At the same time, I do think the conversation should go beyond just reposting creepy messages for outrage. Women have every right to call it out, but the larger issue is that too many men are still being raised or conditioned to think persistence, entitlement, and lack of restraint are normal. That has to be challenged more directly. The burden should not be on women to endlessly adapt to bad behavior. The burden should be on men to develop basic self-awareness, emotional control, and respect.

Women are not overreacting. The problem is that too many men still underreact to the behavior of other men.