I got an ADHD diagnosis today.

Yesterday on a whim while sitting with a friend having coffee I phoned to confirm my psychiatrist referral had been received. I was lucky enough and surprised to be given an appointment for today due to a cancellation.

I went to bed last night feeling anxious thinking I’d made up my whole story and was going to look ridiculous sitting in front of the psychiatrist telling her about my “ADHD”.

Well today I sat with an absolutely lovely psychiatrist who asked me the questions and listened to my answers for a good hour and 15 minutes. After that I felt a bit silly again, until she said “yes I do think you have ADHD”. We talked about medication and I have been prescribed vyvanse.

I’m 41 years old and I think I just feel numb. I don’t know what to expect when I take the medication tomorrow and I don’t know what to think and feel about the way the last 18 to 24 months of my life have played out. I quit study due to being so unable to focus and organise assessments, I lost a relationship due to stress around work, study and my daughter transitioning out of school early to work full time, my self esteem had been slowly declining and no doubt I was (and still am) experiencing symptoms of perimenopause. I was not in a good way.

I’m still not to be honest. I’ve become really depressed (I am taking medication) and I’ve lost a lot of self confidence. I don’t know what’s next.

Just wanted to share with people who are likely to relate in some way.