Why did you delay divorce?

Why did you postpone divorce?

Idk if there are many betrayed partners here but it’s worth a try. Wayward partners are welcome to answer as well if you have any helpful insight. As a BP, why did you post-pone the divorce? If you were in separation and barely in contact with your partner why did you delay divorce? Did you end up divorcing and then reconciling?

My partner has said they want a divorce since discovery day 2 which happened in September 2025. We have stayed in contact for nearly 7 months now, we mostly talk about the divorce which isn’t in progress yet as far as I know and they don’t respond much to my emotional texts or apologies, they keep bringing up the divorce but has yet to actually file and won’t see me in person either. I’m just trying to understand from their perspective what’s going on. It doesn’t seem like they want to reconciliation but tbh I have no idea what’s going on with them. I don’t want the divorce but it’s not really up to me. I want to try for R but I’m trying not to force a situation they would be unhappy in and I’m trying to cooperate with them but it seems like no matter what I do whether it’s tell them I still love and care for them or I just try to go along with the divorce it’s not the right move in their eyes. I’m just at a loss. I want us to communicate but I don’t know how when I keep getting shut down. I don’t want to give up but I don’t want to be delusional either. They said maybe to counseling after divorce but idk if I can count on that.

I’m in IC. I got my own apartment a couple months ago. I’m reading the books.

I’m not complaining about a situation I caused. I just want to understand. I am willing to wait for them but I also don’t want to end up looking like a fool for waiting. I’ve already made myself a fool due to my actions. I know that I caused real harm. I don’t know if it’s something we can come back from and be better for it.

Also if it isn’t clear. I cheated on my husband. So please keep that in mind if you are responding. I’m not proud of it.