I wish someone would be there for me.

I feel so alone. My family doesn’t know how to comfort one another. When I was a little kid and I cried, I was left to cry myself to sleep or just simply calm down. I’m a lot older now, but it has honestly gotten worse. Instead of being met with comfort and a warm embrace, my mom just yells at me and smacks me if I don’t listen to her. I don’t expect my mom to be kind to me anyways since she’s been rude and kinda abusive to me for the past few years. My dad is a different story, though. He’s definitely the better parent to me. He’s nice, but whenever I start crying it’s like someone else is switched on in him. He doesn’t try to console me. He usually gets angry and tells me to stop crying. He also typically tells me that I shouldn’t be crying because whatever happened is my fault. I don’t remember a single time where any of my parents hugged me and told me everything was gonna be okay. As the only daughter in a family with two brothers, life sucks. One of my brothers genuinely hates my guts and wants me gone. Seriously. Like dead. He’s always insulted me and been violent to me. Both physically and verbally. My parents always let him off so easily. They get mad at him and tell him to stop saying nonsense, but they don’t do anything else. My other brother is better, but he’s also pretty rude especially when he’s mad at me. I wish I had some other family member to lean on, but sadly I don’t have a big family at all. I have to deal with my own problems and feelings. I know it’s not healthy. I don’t know how to feel. I haven’t had great thoughts lately. I just feel stupid and untalented. Thanks for letting me vent.