AITAH for wanting my girlfriend to stay with me even if it might ruin her life

TL;DR:

I (18F) have been in a secret relationship with my girlfriend (18F) for 2 years after starting as close friends in middle school. We’re both about to graduate and realize it’ll be much harder to keep our relationship hidden, especially because she has very strict Catholic parents who are strongly against her being in a same-sex relationship. They have already threatened to send her to conversion therapy and her father has had a one-on-one chat with her about how her dating a girl would “break his heart”.

We deeply love each other and believe we could have a future together, but we’re stuck at a crossroad. What should we do? End things now before it hurts more, stay together and risk it getting worse later, take a break, or just let things play out?

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I (18F) honestly feel like I don’t really have anyone to talk to about this, so I’m turning to Reddit. I’ve never told anyone that I have a girlfriend (18F, I’ll call her K). We met about five years ago in middle school and became really close friends around four years ago. That’s when we started catching feelings for each other. We’ve been dating for two years now, and somehow we’ve kept it completely private this whole time from her unsupportive Catholic parents.

For some background, K and I are currently seniors, a few months away from graduating, and are starting to realize we won’t be able to easily hide our relationship after we’ve finished high school. I know this issue may sound silly because we’re both still only in high school and have so much life ahead of us, but neither of us are unintelligent. Her and I are top in the class and not just another pair of dumb high schoolers. We are both aware high school relationships don’t usually last, and this may as well just be another “dumb” relationship that happened once upon a time. But for us, we know we could live our entire lives together just as happy as any other couple even if we’re both girls — and I’m not just saying that.

We’ve chosen to keep our relationship a secret because both of us are very private people. Nobody knows either of us like girls, and we live in a small suburban town where being gay is usually frowned upon. The largest reason is that my girlfriend, K, comes from an extremely Catholic family.

I’m going to keep it vague so I don’t write too much (but I’m willing to add more if it helps with context), but her family is pretty intense, and not in a good way. Her father has very slight autism, so he doesn’t help much with family issues, and her mother has some sort of issues (possibly BPD or narcissism). A few months ago, her mother found a note she had written me that said “I love you, honey” in it (I know, cringe). K was able to play it off as a joke, but before that her mother threatened to send her to a conversion therapy camp. Her father had a talk with her after the note was found and said that if she was ever in a gay relationship, it would “break his heart.” Which was just a punch to the gut.

K herself is still Catholic and holds all of her same beliefs, but also loves me even though she is not supposed to. I know that’s confusing, and not all Catholics would agree with it but that just how it is. (Sorry)

Currently, we are at a crossroads. We’ve realized our relationship has a fast approaching expiration date. I’ve tried to leave the decision of whether or not we should stay together up to my girlfriend because she’s ultimately the one who would be possibly losing her family.

The only issue is, we don’t want to lose each other, which makes this situation feel like an inescapable trap, a lose-lose. Both of us have been so in best friends and so in love I couldn’t even begin to describe it. I don’t want to end things before they can truly begin, but I also don’t want her to lose her family over a relationship that COULD end. I am positive it wouldn’t, just because of the type of people her and I are. Then again I’m an 18-year-old with no where to turn to but Reddit.

What should we do? End things now before it hurts more, stay together and risk it getting worse later, take a break, or just let things play out?