I (33M) am starting to get frustrated when visiting my girlfriend’s (28F) parents.

I (33M) have been with (28F) for 3 years, living together for 2. I love being in a relationship with her and she is a very impressive person. She is a dentist, a former varsity athlete, and she is someone I feel aligned with. My main issue lately has been regarding our relationship with her parents. I need to highlight that they are very nice people and very supportive. Anytime we need help with something, they are always willing to be there for us. They are nice people no doubt. They also live 5 minutes away, which has its pros and cons.

At first I really enjoyed seeing them. They were new to me and I felt like I gained a new family. But something always felt “off” to me. I told myself “it’s early and maybe things will change when they get to know me better”. They haven’t, and I’ve been feeling worse about things over the past 3 ish months. I’ll highlight a couple things I’ve noticed:

They never really ask me any questions about my life. They know surface level stuff, but that’s it. Every time I see them, I’m the one asking how things are going. Most visits I rarely have the chance to talk, and they just talk about themselves (their interests, their accomplishments, niche things that I can’t contribute to). When I do talk, I feel super uncomfortable, because it feels like I’m taking away from the conversation. I thought maybe that they hated me, but I’m noticing they do this to the other siblings’ partners as well.

I find them weirdly controlling and even insecure. They sometimes try to get in my girlfriend’s ear about stuff to go against what I want. Usually this is stuff that WE talk about doing ourselves, and it’s almost like they are trying to get her to listen to them instead of make decisions with her partner. It makes me feel as though they don’t trust my judgement and will try to be overly involved in all areas of our lives.

Lastly, they visit way too often, and get upset if we turn down their invitations. We visit my parents once every two months (they live 200km away) and they never complain about visits. They ask to hang out 2 times per week sometimes, and get weird if we say we’re busy. Another thing that bothers me is that they try to use hang outs as an opportunity to ask my gf to “check something” with their teeth. She has told me a few times that she isn’t comfortable with this, and I agree.

It’s important to note that I’ve communicated my issues with my gf and she agrees with them completely. She has tried to start setting boundaries with her parents, and is taking my concerns seriously. Her parents however get upset with us when she does that, and will even get argumentative with her.

I guess my question is, what can I do here? And is this normal? I love my girlfriend and want this to work, but I feel frustrated by her parents almost every time I see them. I have suggested that she visit them without me sometimes, and she’s ok with that idea. I just want to make sure I’m not being unreasonable here.

TL;DR: I get frustrated when visiting my gf’s parents. What can I do?