My Life Sucks Right Now

Hey guys……

So, just gonna give a run-down. I apologize if it’s a mess.

I’m 25F, and have a history of SH/ depression/ anxiety/ panic disorder etc. Living in a house with six dudes, one being my fiancé. Trying to do an irish goodbye sometime in the next few weeks. My fiance has been abusive towards me emotionally and financially, with one case of hurting me physically. We’ve been together for 2 years. We usually split costs of everything, but I buy and he doesn’t always pay me back immediately, even when I need it.

Ive been getting a ton of NSF charges, stemming from “I will send you the money,” I make the payment since it takes a bit to go through and expect to have the correct amount in the bank once he sends it, but it doesn’t always happen. My landlord just blocked me from making any other payments online, so now have to do it in person. Thats great!

Ive been drinking almost every day the last 3 months. I relapsed and hurt myself. I hate having sex. I am broke with car issues. I have 40k in student loans and 7k credit card debt. Just got a ticket, and I want to just cease at this point.

Told my family about the fiancé stuff so they’ll help with that, at least. Really scared he knows my reddit somehow and will see this.

Yay, rant over! I hope y’all are having a better year than me.