Anxious of seconds wasted

2 years ago I (17M) was very anxious of every second that I waste since Chinese school culture

So lecture waste time since I have to keep looking up and down and in between looking up and looking down my eye can look at nothing

I hate conversations planning reflection & anything that have no realtionship with directly doing work. Also talking, writing, and walking are too slow. Even the speed of my inner voice is too slow, and I can't do math problems without saying things out loud in my mind

There are efficiency upper limits for many tasks. To name a few, vocabulary memorization (speed hard to improve), reading (many words doesn't have a meaning, and I have to process them anyways. Word processing is linear)

I got into this conflict with my dad for starting to read a book every time we wait for more than 2 minutes somewhere during travels. He told me it's disrespectful for him and I couldn't get

I made incredible discoveries that I can listen to music while doing tasks, think math while eating, read the previous sentence while writing the latter, read books on cars, eat eggs while walking, multitask, meditate while drawing geometry diagrams, and use low energy tasks as rests

I was so confused why nobody told me to do these things earlier

I thought no-one else on this planet experience what I experienced

Often I end up wanting to achieve everything and "reach maximum efficiency" but not actually doing anything. Also I'm more or less always forced to waste some time (e.g. daily routines, busywork homework). I then thought "perfect efficiency is impossible"

Also I thought the internet and common interface designs are ridiculous since it ignores microscopic time wastes (e.g. I cannot bulk download every file attached to pdf storage websites and I have to click on links for 20 times if I want to download 20 pdfs which wastes 5 minutes, Preview doesn't support image inversion, Microsoft word doesn't support multiple tabs, Safari webpages are hard to manage)

Resources aren't centralized and systematic (if it was then why hadn't I realized that I can listen to music while doing tasks? As another example nobody told me to take notes about my life, resulting in details of grades 8 and 9 mostly forgotten and never analyzable)

Yeah ofc now I realize my past mentality is somewhat flawed and there are different perspectives of life