I’m starting to hate being Catholic

I just want to start off by saying I have no plans on leaving the Church. I’m just frustrated and maybe someone here can give me some advice or tough love.

I have two kids, 6 months and 20 months, and I’m a full time pumper. I‘m a diocesan TLM goer so I have to drive 40+ minutes to Mass on Sundays. I know no one at Mass since I can’t stay afterwards for their gatherings since I have to quickly go home to eat, pump, put kids down for naps. My son is very difficult during Mass. We sit in the back to not bother people but then he can’t see, everything is in Latin, he gets bored, and acts out. To be fair, he isn’t that much better when we go to a Novus Ordo Mass near our home.

I went over a month without receiving communion because every parish near me has confession for an hour on Saturday. I’m already depressed and sleep deprived as is and have slept through confession times.

I have to practice stage 3 NFP due to my severe postpartum depression. I have to pee on a stick every morning and spend $100+ a month for tests. I tried to open up to a priest about my NFP struggles, but he started talking about how there are women everyday getting abortions. I just kept it brief and left.

Whenever I opened up to a group of Catholic women about my PPD and NFP issues I get the same exact lines. “It’s your cross” “There are women who are struggling with infertility” “Pray about it”

I went to confession yesterday and I usually feel great afterwards but I just feel worse. I don’t know if I’d even survive another postpartum period, but I hate the thought of practicing NFP forever. I’m just exhausted with all of this