Feeling depressed that my cousin got into a university program I wanted to get into.

So me and my cousin are one year apart. I’m one year older. We used to be rly close but as we got older his parents started to compare him against me and I feel like this created a lot of silent animosity between us to the point he was always trying to outdo me. Anyways last year there was this one program I wanted to get into (it’s basically a lottery to get in) but anyways, I wasn’t fortunate enough to get in.

Fast forward to today and my cousin gets in. The first thing his dad does is call my dad to tell him. Ofc my dad tells me and I feel shitty. Idk I just feel like it’s something that I at least deserve too. I wouldn’t be as mad if we both got in but me not getting in and him getting in has really ticked me off. I just know that I won’t be hearing the end of this for at least the next few months whether that’s through indirect comments or bragging or whatnot. If you’re from an ethnic background you know EXACTLY what I’m referring to.

To preface all this, my cousin likes to show off. I’m not like that. I take secret pride in knowing that I’ll always have one up on him in terms of academics. He’s never been too studious. It’s just he has helicopter parents. Me on the other hand my parents have been pretty hands off because they know I’m motivated on my own. All throughout high school I was a hard worker. Him in the other hand, he just started putting in work in the final year and I guess it paid off. It feels like my identity is falling apart. Honestly I just needed to vent. Hoping someone can provide guidance on how I can see this in the perspective of Islam.