Dynasty is everywhere but my kingdom

Playing as florence. As the title says, all my kids, siblings, and everyone else is away and not available to use INCLUDING MY RULER. prior to this, it happened with another nation and I got so aggravated that I invaded and annexed every one of their provinces to see if that would help, but they just moved from where they were to the Papal states. my ruler is away as a courtier for some Italian state and I can't use him as a general. and because everyone else is also unavailable, my crown power is tanking. this is very aggravating, does anyone know what I can do here? it seems so stupid