TW! I'M SO FUCKING SCARED

I'm really scared, I feel like I'm going to have another spiral, a really bad one. I just convinced myself that I have certain illness(I don't want to specify because it may be triggering) and when I convince myself that I have an illness I GET SYMPTOMS OF IT. I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO. I JUST CAN'T STOP THINKING ABOUT IT. I DON'T WANT TO THINK. My spirals last like a month. I was doing kind of fine, but I'm decaying again!!! 💔💔😿😿😿