45 [M4A] Imagining her with someone new

At first the thought of her with someone else after we broke up made me physically nauseous. Then one night many months later I found myself thinking about her, how good she was in bed, how much she enjoyed sex and how much she craved it, and I began imagining she was she was having sex with someone else at right that very moment. The erection that followed was intense, visualizing the two of them fucking, the noises they made, her hips thrusting and thighs squeezing as her orgasm consumes her. The orgasm for myself that followed was so deep and intense it almost brought me to tears afterwards. Now I think very often about what kind of sex she might be having these days.

Anyone else relate to these kinds of feelings? The mixture of jealousy and grief and arousal is hard to explain but it’s a heady and intoxicating combination. Would love to have a mutually engaged and genuine chat with someone who can relate or is curious. Not interested in cuckolding in the traditional sense, though I suppose these fantasies are cuckold-adjacent, and not interested in stories about hooking up with an old flame. Especially interested in chatting with those closer to me in age and older.