Please read if you are deep in newborn trenches and are questioning everything

I have gone through posts captioned ‘will it ever get better’ numerous times a day till she turned 10 weeks. So I wanted to come here and write this for someone like me.

Since the day she was born, she wouldn’t sleep. She would sleep in the day when everyone was around and at night when it was just my husband and I she would just scream and cry. There was no end to it. She eventually stopped sleeping during the day as well. I would rock her for 20-25 mins and she wouldn’t sleep. I would contact nap with her and for a week she liked that and then she stopped doing that as well. She would sleep for only 30-35 mins in the stroller and would then wake up and scream. I was so miserable. I have cried every single day. I loved my cat more during those days and thought how lucky she is.

She didn’t have colic or reflux. She just didn’t know how to sleep and putting her to sleep was incredibly hard. Harder than anything else.

She would cry so much. I would look at her and feel pain and those were just the darkest days of my life.

Week 6-8 were so tough. God. I would leave her in the room and go to the other room and scream and cry. My husband had to request more off for us to make it work.

Then she turned 10 weeks and one day in the morning when she woke up she smiled. I couldn’t believe it. How one simple smile could change so much for me. Slowly it started getting better. She started requiring less effort. It was and still is difficult but when she smiles and babbles and looks at you like there’s no one else, you forget everything. I could finally see that she’s a small person and not some screaming machine.

I wasn’t prepared for the love I would feel for this tiny human. She’s so lovely. So sweet and warms up my heart like nothing else.

I know and I can see a 4th month regression coming up. But now I know that too shall pass like the trenches did.

It does get better. I wish I could go back and hug myself and my husband. If you are going through this, hang tight. It truly is survival mode and it will get better.