is it wrong to pursue God because of a relationship?

Hello, first time posting here. For context, I, 19f, have never been religious. I grew up in Pentecostal churches with my parents, but after COVID, my sibling and I never returned with them. Neither of us really enjoyed going to church and we did not continue to pursue religion after we stopped attending.

I have never been an atheist, more so an agnostic. I've always felt that there had to be some higher power, but as to what that was, I could never define myself. I recently found myself questioning my Christian friends, not in a demeaning manner but in genuine curiosity about what motivates their faith.

I have someone I love dearly in my life who has also begun to pursue their faith more. This piqued my interest again.

The main point of this post is that with this person I love, I made a grave mistake out of frustration and anger. I hurt them, unintentionally so, and I have never felt more terribly about myself before. I know their response, reaction, etc, is out of my control, and that they do not owe me forgiveness or a new chance. So I have found myself asking God for forgiveness, for the strength to better myself, to improve my bad patterns, for a chance to redeem myself, to give our relationship strength, to give him strength, to be able to repent - as i've always been aware of my issues, but struggle in changing them. My friend did gift me a devotional, and "Pray for Him" by Amanda Hayhurst, and today I bought my own bible, which I have yet to read.

My question is, is it wrong to pursue religion, Christianity, God, because of an issue in my relationship, if i've never pursued it prior? I may have prayed here and there, but never consistently, or even owned any religious texts.

I do not want to be selfish, so I have refrained from simply asking God to just "fix it". I do not want to pursue religion just because of others influences; I want that to be my own journey that I choose (which I believe so far it is, as any previous attempts to pursue God from friends and family have never motivated me), I am just worried because I am not familiar with the bible, if and what God says about such a thing, etc, besides just what i've googled so I wanted to ask those in this sub who would be more familiar, or if anyone else has had a similar experience.

Thank you :)