I feel super disgusting like everyday.

I know this is a super pick me post but i genuinely have always hated how i looked and it gets to me really bad. I’ve felt ugly since I was a little girl. I always remember being the ugliest one in the friend group and genuinely never fitting in. I’m now 18 and still feel the same exact way. I changed pretty much everything I physically could. I lost over 30 lbs, I changed my hair color twice, I tried new aesthetics, but nothing ever pleased me bc I never looked like the other beautiful girls. Sometimes when I’m out, I see prettier girls and just lose every ounce of confidence I had in me, and I immediately wanted to go home. I have no friends, so I just sit alone all day with my thoughts. I’ve never had a boyfriend or anything, so that makes me feel worse about myself. No matter what I do or how I dress, I don’t feel any different. I see girls online, and they are so gorgeous, it makes me very insecure, especially if they are younger than me. I have a super big forehead, and my features don’t fit each other. I get told all the time that I look super masculine. I’ve always been bullied and made fun of, so it has to be true. I feel so ugly that I hate my life, and it genuinely makes me so angry towards everyone. I can’t see myself as pretty. I only see ugly. I’m not seeking attention i genuinely want help. I struggle with an ED so when i eat i feel worse especially if it likes fast food or fatty foods.