What were seemingly "normal" things you experienced growing up, that you now realize is narc abuse?

1. Whenever I get bullied by my siblings and I would tell Nmom, she would either say things like "just ignore them, they will stop" or "don't stress me out".

• As I grew older, I realized that she was conditioning me to accept the bullying and become the scapegoat. She also didn't care how I felt and was more concerned by not upsetting the bullies (her favorite children).

2. When I make a little mess at the house, she screams the shit at me. But when my siblings make a mess, she lets it go, and I also have to clean it. If I don't do it or reject it, I'm apparently "evil".

3. When GC Nsis feels sick, everyone would be required to put out all the stops to cater to her. But when I feel sick, I'm apparently "faking it".

4. When Nmom takes home gifts and treats from her trips, GC Nsis always gets to have the best options. But when I try to ask for the best option, I'm apparently "selfish".

5. When something happens at home and I speak the truth of what actually happened, Nmom would get angry at me because she wants to be the one speaking about it. She would make it seem like "adult business only, you're just a kid". Her goal is to lie and twist information.

These are only a few of the many many things. To normal families, these would seem to be simply just "parents having preference or favorites". But to people like us, we know these are manipulations, gaslighting, and scapegoating.

What are your experiences?