I might have just fumbled the loml

I came to a foreign country to study a bit over a month ago. Not even 2 weeks onto my stay I met this guy. We hit it off at first and exchanged socials. When I came back home I noticed that he was a friend of a friend (We are both from different countries and our mutuals were in a different continent). This just made me think that maybe it was meant to be and we started meeting up. He was someone I have always wanted in a partner. Caring, thoughtful, observant and respectful.

The problem is that I went through a very traumatic breakup a little over a year ago and have promised myself to not date anyone until I graduated university. Even though I wanted to know him better I had huge commitment issues. My feelings were divided. My heart wanted to be with him but my brain didn’t.

I went on 6 dates within the span of 2 weeks. He asked me to be his girlfriend on the 3rd date but I turned him down. On the 5th date I agreed because at that moment it felt right. However, after our last date together i just didn’t feel great, I have only been in this new country for a month and I already got a boyfriend. It just added onto the stress of moving to a new country. I explained that to him from the first time he asked me to be his girlfriend and said I wanted to take things slow. But our chemistry together was through the roof. I could not control myself around him and didn’t take things slow. Because of this I was very emotionally unstable, wanting to be with him to wanting to be alone and being scared to fall in love again. This has made him confused. On the last date it was beautiful. Cherry blossoms blooming and the conversations we had felt surreal. But when I went home I didnt feel happy or excited, I felt scared to commit and be called someones girlfriend. When I told him this he said he was drained from this back and forth and we should probably stop and so I agreed I wanted to say this to him but I couldn’t say that. It was a hard decision but I stand by it. I just am thinking if I had met him just afew months after it would’ve been something. After all this he blocked me instagram but still checks my tiktok profile. Should I text him again when I am ready for a relationship or should I just let him go?