Pakistani international student in US

Hi guys. I am Pakistani international student in US. Who belongs to 🏳️‍🌈 community and is exmuslim. Still in closet for both of those. The reason I am posting here today, is 1) to come out and introduce myself to fellow exmuslim.

2. find anyone in same shoes as me.

My question is how do you guy feel! If you have traveled out of Muslim country do you still feel afraid and conservative or the change was easier? Even though I am away from Pakistan now, I think my brain is wired to be afraid, that someone is watching or I’ll be punished. How do you guys deal with that?

And lastly as an ex I know it’s very very very tough to be brave and accept ourselves and to accept the fact. So more power to all of you. Each and everyone of you is amazing 🫶