I teally cant do this anymore

Really, really, I won't be able to continue this anymore because my mother is constantly mobbing, I couldn't live my youth, I'm constantly in a comparison, the reason for every bad thing is me, it's constantly exploding at me, insults, swearing, I didn't come to this life willingly, but I'm going to go willingly, I seriously can't stand it, I don't have any friends without a joke, I don't have a girlfriend, if I say brother, it's cold to me because of my mother, I'll kill myself in June and im sorry for if my English is bad