My avoidant ex doesn’t wants to be friends with me

It’s all over between us. For good.

Both of us accepted that we can’t be friends, because she said, “we always end up going beyond friendship, (my name).”

And a relationship isn’t possible because she said, “maybe I still like you, but I don’t feel that ‘I want you’ from inside.”

So eventually, we both said goodbye. Wished each other good luck for the future. “Stay happy.” “Take care of yourself.”

And that was it. A very, very emotional moment for both of us.

I asked, “should I block you?” She said, “do whatever feels suitable to you.” I said, “okay, I’ll do it then. Otherwise I’ll keep expecting texts.”

It’s all finished. One of the most heartfelt moments of my life so far, maybe the most.

But I am crying howling like a baby because she was my best friend first, so I just lost my best friend permanently. It was first relationships for both of us (we’re both almost 30, but never dated before because of career commitments), so the feelings were/are very deep and mutual. But I don’t want to lose my friend. I wish I could change her decision.