I am writing this to document my experience in Korea. But more importantly, also to understand how much my experience matches what others have gotten over there.

Intro: I am average to decent looking, but more importantly, I am an experienced Daygamer. I can already do well in the West, and by all means, comparatively, I wouldn't call Korea as an upgrade.

What went well:

- Cost of living: I was on 1500$/month (all inclusive) in a very decent central studio in Seoul.

- High novelty: at one point I was dating a girl and her best friend, I was hooking up with my landlord, and one time I had a "date" in a bus, then straight to her home (albeit this was from a night out). Many a time, the girls were in utter disbelief on the speed of things, and I believe they actually meant it. What I was offering was truly out of the script of society. Now, this is not to brag, because my next point...

The emptiness

I failed for all intents and purposes to connect with the girls, and I don't know why. Language barrier is part of it, but I don't think that is the full story. The dates were certainly not materialistic, it is the only place were girls actually offered to pay for the date twice (both of those went to nowhere*), and never had objections to the usual Dutch paying.

However, despite of all this, it felt I was trapped in a superficiality, no real curiosity, appearances before substance, and raw sexuality just for the sake of sexuality. The girls were demanding a second round, but had no desire themselves to please.. it felt very self centered, it felt empty. It felt as if the girl had use for you so long you were validating her experience and world view, then she would distance herself the moment you were to present anything different. It really made me wonder whether this is something normal here, because I have never experienced it on this scale before.

This is all amplified by the disconnect with the local culture. As I wasn't speaking Korean, the locals had no interest to engage with me with anything other than mandatory interactions (for example shops/restaurants). They would insist talking Korean at me with little interest to translate or use English or sign language.

I am mentioning this because this was also my experience in the street. The 1 in 20 girls that knew English would stop for a chat, and usually it would go well, but for the other 19, I was a ghost.

My Question

I am writing all this to question how outlier was this experience, and how common it is in other places in SE Asia. If you have any thoughts, I would be happy to hear them!