My Fiancé (M36) thinks im overreacting (f26)

I’ve been angry with my fiancé for the past two days after something that happened at a pub. We were with some of his friends who turned out to be extremely homophobic (I didn’t know beforehand that they held these views, otherwise I wouldn’t have joined), and they started making jokes while expressing their hatred about gay people. I didn’t find it funny at all, especially since most of my closest friends are queer.

At one point, two gay people walked past us, and one of the guys made a joke about them, as if he was reinforcing his point. Everyone laughed, including my fiancé. I felt really uncomfortable and ended up leaving. My fiancé followed me and said he wasn’t laughing at them, just at how quickly his friend came up with the joke. He also said he didn’t want to “give them the satisfaction” by reacting, which I don’t fully understand. Especially since he knows this topic is sensitive for me.

This isn’t the first time something like this has happened. Recently, we were at a café working on our laptops, and there was a guy sitting near us. My fiancé started mimicking the way he spoke and whispering jokes to me. It made me uncomfortable, especially because the person could have overheard.

There have been multiple situations like this where we’re in public and he’ll quietly make comments about someone’s appearance or behavior. Even if the person doesn’t hear it, being part of that situation makes me feel uneasy.

He says I’m too sensitive and that it’s a generational difference. He told me he’ll just keep those thoughts to himself from now on and not share them with me. He also insists he’s not hurting anyone, just “highlighting stereotypes” and making jokes about common things, not targeting anyone directly.

I wouldn’t mind him sharing his opinion and thoughts when we’re alone in the car or at home.

how can I move past this whole situation?