I'd pull a Kyu-Kurarin, but I know it would hurt if I did, so that's why I'd rather stay alive.

Hey, so I don't normally really vent like this, but I'm really feeling down up to the point where I'm having thoughts like... this. My brother's using my image as a lazy asian girl who literally does nothing around the house to somewhat harass me, but I don't think it's harassment, but it's just pressure that seems harsh to get me to move and stuff and do the laundry.

He's also linking it to my Spring Break starting tomorrow and he's like "I know you have your break tomorrow, so you better get it done." like, I KNOW. It's also the fact I'm super sensitive to things like criticism, pressure, or just advice, so I started crying immediately after he left my room.

I know I'm lazy sometimes, but it's due to my mental health and other stuff, y'know, the mom having stage 4 colon cancer and the divorce. I don't really see my worth anymore, but seeing people happy with what I do makes me happy and seeing people who are mad at me makes my feelings about myself worse. Honestly, if I see people who are kinda harsh to me smile (example, my teachers, my family, etc.), I'd smile too.

Overall, I'm just saying I want to enjoy my 1-week break in peace and not have it ruined by chores and things that will end up becoming useless in the future. Not trying to grab attention, just wanted to put this out there.

- made as a message to my peers, brother, and that one specific math teacher I have