40F, $2M liquid, love my job but divorced because of it – now torn between work, love.

Hi FIRE,I’m 40F, based in Los Angeles. Divorced 3 years ago. The main reason? My work schedule. I was (and still am) very busy, and my ex eventually couldn’t take it. No hard feelings – it just didn’t work.

Financially, I have about $2M in liquid assets (no debt). By most FIRE math, that’s enough for me to retire comfortably. I live reasonably, no kids, and my lifestyle doesn’t require a partner’s income. I also love skiing, golf, and tennis – so I have ways to fill time.

Here’s where I’m genuinely stuck – and I’d love feedback from this community:

1. Work vs. love – can you really have both?

I truly love my work. It makes me feel alive, especially after the divorce. But I also want to start a new relationship. Everyone around me says “you can’t have a high-powered career and a great relationship.” My own history seems to prove that. I don’t want to give up work, but I also don’t want to be alone forever.

2. Should I just retire?

I don’t need the money. At all. But retiring feels like losing a part of my identity. On the other hand, if I keep working at this pace, will I even have time to meet someone and build something real? I’m not getting younger.

3. Partner’s finances

I don’t need financial support, but I’d strongly prefer a partner who also has their own financial foundation – not wealth, just enough that they’re not looking to me for security. Is that unreasonable? And how do you even screen for that without sounding cold?

So I’m caught between:

Keep working (which I love) and risk repeating the same failed pattern.

Retire early (which I can afford) but feel like I’m shrinking my world.

Has anyone here successfully found love *after* FIRE or while still working a demanding job? Did retiring actually help with relationships, or did it create new problems?

Thanks for any honest thoughts. I know these are privileged problems, but the confusion is real.