I have Elhers Danlos hyper mobility syndrome (and a few other things and comorbidities) and so far, the cycle goes: start new job> work until too burnt out or injured to continue> scramble> find and start new job> repeat

Also, each time I repeat the cycle, I accrue more permanent damage. I’m already too bad off to work an office job, (my dream job, engineering, which I am/was really good at and love) and I don’t know what I can do next. Going on disability isn’t a real option, because all the specialists for this disorder don’t take any kind of insurance, and are thousands of dollars. (Plus, my family would make sure that didn’t happen and tarnish their name)

I’m currently about to leave the most chill job possible (work from home whenever, pick your own working times as long as you show up to meetings, overtime is given back as time off that can be taken at will, all time off is nearly automatically accepted) because of the field installation part that I can no longer do. I previously worked in an actual office job at a huge corporation, and that also gave me permanent damage. I can no longer stand for more than an hour or two a day, and sitting upright for very long is also excruciating.

I hate this so much, because I was good at my job and loved it, and have wanted to create things since I was a kid, but I’m losing it all because my 24 year old body can’t keep up. 

I’m usually an optimist despite struggling with Massive, and now medicated, depression, (the irony is not lost), and I’m trying to tell myself that God will take care of me like he always has in the past (he really has though, this job I’m about to leave showed up with miraculous timing and configuration), and that somehow I’ll end up in a better situation, but today I am scared anyway.

Starts new job> works until critical injury related to preexisting condition >repeats (tw: medical trauma also)