Fantasies gone wild

So just u know I'm only 19F and I've been masturbating since 14 , at first it was more of like innocent fantasies like my crush or some stuff but as I grow older it's growing in the wrong ways ,first it was by older men ,it was as a joke or smt I tell guys my age I want to reject that I prefer older men but when I tried a 28 y.o I couldn't go back, they have the way of making u feel special and wanted all day long ,so after that I dated my teachers and some of the old men in the family (I was 16 at the time), craving that kind of attention and also changing partners each month or week just because I'm bored or feeling moody, than I started s xting guys on s apchat and tinder (not meeting), and I developed kinks such as wanting to be worshiped and in control but than also wanting to submit and be a slut ,living a double life a player at night knowing how to please a man and an innocent girl in morning ,keeping the act wasnt that hard for me so i talked to a therapist anonymously and he told me i was a manipulative person ,i feel bad even now especially that I look much more younger than my age (I was targeted by ped*philes many times and got money offered although i'm 19),but the main problem right now is that I developed a love for public masturbation even at college now I would be se ting someone than go to the bathroom masturbat and come back to my lessons like nothing happened ,keeping the door open most of time the thrill of someone noticing making me come harder, at my dad'scar when he go to get groceries and the threat that he might come at any time and catch is actually making me hornier, it's getting out of hands, I almost do it everyday 3 times a day,I wanna commit to my religion but I can't, all my thoughts are on sex , is there anyone like me or am I alone in this banter?