I think he assaulted me because I said no to porn

(I’ve posted once before about a week ago)

41 F and my BF is 44- not that age matters but deep down, I know I KNOW the answer, but I’m trying to make sense of it all.

My BF have a very rocky and toxic relationship. He’s cheated and lied/ manipulated and my reactions have been toxic. My therapist says he has successfully groomed me so when I try to leave, and he’s sad- I stay because I feel bad for him.

Anyways- he definitely has a porn addiction. I’ve caught him watching while we have sex and before hand. There’s been many conversations- he doesn’t see an issue.

Over the weekend, we were going to have sex- he complained for 5 hours because I wouldn’t allow him to put porn on the tv. He was being a total asshole. Even after saying no, he snuck it on his phone while it was happening. There were times were he was being slightly aggressive with the toys that we use - he even said “nope that’s not right, I’m being vindictive”

I finally had enough and told him I was done and wanted to go to bed. It was after midnight at this point.

He was furious because he still hadn’t “finished”. He gave me a hard time for another hour or so, telling me if I wasn’t going to have sex then I had no business being in his house. I offered to leave and started packing and of course he said no.

I recorded some of this because I really wasn’t sure what he was going to do at this point. He wasn’t saying much- just that I’m always starting shit, always trying to fight- and again, I shouldn’t be at his house if I won’t make him cum. I kept telling him he’s welcome to do it himself.

Finally around 1 or so I gave up and had sex.

The next day he apologized and said he was being a brat and an asshole. We talked a little about it but I think it’s hitting me more so today.