I am starting to think I am getting periods through my bussy

I am starting to think I am getting periods through my bussy. Ever since Farnussy fucked my bussy after I got too drunk and thought he flipped his pussy inside out and turned it into a penis, I get these mood swings and my bussy shits out blood. I have started going to the gym more, and lately I noticed that my periods got more intense and my bussy furiously shits out the cum Farnussy ejaculated deep into my bussy before shitting out blood. The other day, I was doing some heavy deadlifts trying to make my bussy tight again by adding some muscle mass to my cheeks, and in the middle of my third set, the sheer pressure caused by my abdominal walls as I was bracing for a 200-pound pull created a localized atmospheric event inside my rectum, and just like that, my pelvic floor just gave up. A frothy mix of fermented Farnussy cream and fresh bussy periods blood shot out with such a velocity that people thought a giant just shat on them. Embarrassed, I bolted out of the gym in tears as I also creamed my pants at the same time. If I were to go to a doctor about this, how should I explain this to him? I am not too proud of myself.