my aunt is absolutely insane. long post sorry!

okay so i just need to vent a lil. this is going to be VERY long and it doesn’t have to do with me (i am blessed with an incredible MIL, sorry y’all) it has to do with my cousin and his fiancée being first time parents and my weird family and very weird aunt. i just need to get this out to people who obviously don’t know me or my insane family to see if im in the wrong and crazy lol.

so, i have a decent sized family. i have 3 cousins and two brothers (so 6 of us in total) i am the only girl of our generation. i’m the second oldest of us 6, and i had the first child of the new generation. i had my son when i was 23 and my support system was amazing! my aunts flew to me every chance they got to help, my parents were there for the birth (they all live in CA while i live in MI) and it was great! no overstepping, no crazy inappropriate stuff yk?

soooo now my older cousin is engaged and they are having a baby (CRAZY story there- they didn’t realize they were pregnant until she was 30 weeks so they only have now 9ish weeks to get everything ready- do the gender reveal, the baby shower, the nursery, everything!) here’s where the craziness comes in.

my aunt (the mom of my cousin that’s the father of the new baby coming) is being crazy- at least i think she is. she is a boy mom, she has 3 boys (all adults now- all of us cousins are) and me and her were never close until i had my son. so she never got the “baby girl” that she always wanted. weelllll turns out, the baby is a girl!!! i am so excited and trying to provide as much help as i can BUT i think my aunt is trying too.. hard? i dont know how to explain it but i feel like she is acting like this is her chance and her baby!

first (and worst)- the gender reveal party. she paid for a 4D ultrasound for them to find out the gender asap which is very nice! but she got upset when they didn’t want her there because they wanted that moment for themselves, COMPLETELY UNDERSTANDABLE! they are new parents and they want to have their moments, me and my husband did the same thing and no one had a problem then. so the party is the next day (day before easter) she wears THE MOST INAPPROPRIATE OUTIFT i have ever seen!!! boobs fully out, short as hell, literally just not at all okay for a party like that ESPECIALLY as the soon to be grandmother! it was so bad in fact that her best friend made her switch outfits with her and she took the heat for the outfit (one thing abt my family is that they WILL say something about stuff like that). when my cousin and the mama announced the gender, my aunt did not hesitate to run up to just him and jump all over him and hug him, not the mama. i feel like im the only person that noticed and felt some type of way (though im sure my cousins fiancée felt awkward as well). also- she was TRASHED. like fully wasted. her and my cousins dad were. this party was also the first time my family met my cousins fiancées family so it was important! (note- the fiancées family is EXTREMELY religious and doesn’t not really speak english so this was supposed to be a real blending of families and apparently (i wasn’t there, i was on facetime the whole time) my aunt did not want to interact with fiancés family at all (unfortunately my aunt is maga🙄)) i’m getting off track a little, but basically, it was a fucking shit show.

second- the facebook post. my cousin and his fiancée aren’t big social media people but she did finally post about it yesterday. my aunt gave her THREE MINUTES before making her own post and completely overshadowing the fiancées post. that’s not really the issue tho, the issue is what the post says. saying how i’m excited she is for her “baby boy” (my cousin) but barely mentioning his fiancée THE LITERAL MOTHER of the child. and then the comment she made on her own post today “Thank you everyone for all the love. I could not be more excited to watch my son be a girl dad and finally get my girl!” ……. am i the only one who thinks this is crazy? my mom only had 2 girls, me and my little sister, but she would NEVER say this about my son, or completely exclude the father of my child.

idk am i looking into this too much??? call me crazy but if this were my MIL i would be losing my shit. my cousins fiancee and i are very similar- we are both very quiet and shy and introverted so i know she wouldn’t say anything about it if she did feel uncomfortable but i would hate for her to feel like that yk? she is the sweetest girl and i care for her and i don’t want my crazy ass aunt to come between her and my cousin! my son is so excited for his new baby cousin and i would hate for them to pull away from the family (which is a normal thing for this family to do- just pull away when things get crazy) there’s just so much lore and drama with my family- everyone pretty much hates eachother but we also are all very close and love eachother it’s just an odd dynamic it would take years to catch someone up on all of our drama, me and my husband have been together also 6 years and there’s still new things to tell him from the last after all this time.

idk,, just lmk if i’m crazy or if i should say anything. or if anyone has any advice on how to bring it up to the fiancée carefully just to make sure she’s not feeling weird. bc if she is i WILL say something to my aunt, i just don’t want i create unnecessary drama but i feel protective over them. thanks!