Am I the asshole for calling out my vegan friend?
Okay so here it is.
I (32M) called out my vegan friend (33F) on her food ethic.
For context, i am a chef. I value food and products very much. I only eat and cook products of season and locals. I hunt and fish myself, have my own garden and only go to locals farmers/productors for the extra stuff i can't produce myself. I know it's not something everyone can do, and i don't judge people who have different food habit, or eating industrial food.
Today i invited my friends for brunch. I cooked for everyone, some have allergies, some have restrictions like being vegan. So I cooked a shitload of different meals to please everyone, and tell everyone that they can leave with all the left over they wanted.
Fast foward, we eating and having a great time. one of my vegan friend, let's call her Jessy, start saying that it was unacceptable to have meat (dog and cat that i hunted myself) one the table when i knew that some of us where vegan. I thought nothing of it and simply said i cooked for everyone. She claim i didn't think of everyone, that there weren't even avocados, which is "famously" her favorite.
I kind of lost it. It's all kind of blurry right now, but i said something along the lines of "Oh fuck off. You're being hypocrite. You don't want an animal to suffer, but you eat fucking avocados like there is no tomorrow, you don't want a dog to suffer but it's okay that entire community in Mexico are suffering for your fucking avocados toast?" Then i continue on explaining how avocados are one of the worst industries and that she is hypocrite for choosing to see some issues and ignoring others. (I won't explain it all here but look it up if that interest you, it's a fucked up industries.) At the end, Jessy was standing there, cold and distant.
This is where i might be the asshole. Should i have said nothing? As you have guessed by now, food ethic is a big part of my life. But this killed the vibe of the brunch (obviously), and now most of my friends are taking Jessy side, texting me i shouldn't have teached a grown ass woman in front of everyone... they almost all still leave with the left over though. Lol
P.S. I am sure i was more rude than what i sound in the post, here's why i think i might be the asshole.
Posted Apr 8, 2026, 2:50 AM UTC