I hate this height

I’m 5’5 and it sucks in every shape and form I’m normally the shortest person everywhere I go and it’s dehumanising

The only time I’m taller is with my family I’m taller then my sister and my mum and some other people but I’m shorter then every male in my family and they always wanna point it out

And it’s down right embarrassing when my 13 year old nephew is getting taller then me and everyone wants us to go back to back to see how much taller he is then me

And I feel like I’m viewed more femininely because of my height “content I am gay” specially in relationships I’m viewed as the woman because of my height and how l must be soft because of it and it’s especially hard to find relationships in public settings like in bars etc because I look like I’m 12

And clothes always look horrible on me because nowhere has my sizes everything is always to big even in a small

I’m honestly hoping for a random growth spurt at 19 because I heard about some guy that happened to which probably won’t happen to me