Everyone in Overwatch is way too calm about the gorilla

Everyone in the Overwatch lore is like “Winston is a gentle, hyper-intelligent scientist” and I’m just supposed to accept that.

Absolutely not.

That is a gorilla.

You’re telling me I’m supposed to feel safe around a 200kg genetically enhanced gorilla just because he wears glasses and says big words? Oh cool, he can talk about astrophysics— he can also bench press a car and peel me like a banana.

And people are like “he’s friendly :)”
Yeah, so is my dog. My dog cannot enter something called PRIMAL RAGE.

Like, excuse me?? That is NOT a personality trait, that’s a warning label.

Imagine you’re having a normal conversation with him. He’s like “Ah yes, the quantum field—” and then suddenly his brain goes:

gorilla.exe has taken over

Now he’s screaming, jumping 20 feet in the air, and using you as a stress ball.

And I’m just supposed to trust that won’t happen??

No thanks. If I see Winston, I’m calling animal control. Or NASA. They can take that monkey back into the moon for all I care.

Also, I’m just gonna say it: the Overwatch organization collapsing makes a lot more sense when you remember they looked at a literal gorilla and went “yeah, put him on the main strike team.”

That’s not a team, that’s a future incident report.

I don’t care how polite he is. At the end of the day, that "man" is one bad day away from turning anyone into his own personal highlight.