I fucked up my life

I fucked everything in my drop year , I start me jee journey in 12th ( 11th me jee kya hota kuch pata nhi tha ) but due to regular school jee last tak manage nhi kar paya to chhod di and idk how 74 percentile aa gaye so I thought drop le lete hai kya pata jyada aa jaye

Parents ko drop ye kiye convince Kiya but after sometime 8 or 9hr ki class and then hw dpp ye sab manage karne me problem aane lagi diwali tak manage Kiya but uske baad dheere dheere sab fucked up hone laga and at the end sab fucked up kar diya mene january attempt diya fucked up ho gaya 58 percentile aaye but ghar pe jhoot bola ki 82 aaye hai ( family jyada supportive nhi hai marks ko leke bahut sunne ko milta isliye juth bola)

uske baad 2 week demotivated raha fir socha April ka attempt aacha karuga and i fucked up in maths Jo chapter socha tha kam aayege usse questions aa gaye and nhi bani maths so basically April bhi fucked up ho gaya aur mene ghar pe ye bol diya ki pahle jesa gaya hai

And idk what to do now result aayega tab kya karuga ,gharwalo ko kese face dikhauga , me boluga kya ki drop year me sab dene ke baad bhi result nhi aaya.

Jabse exam diya hu bas 2 thought mind me aa rahe su*ide and 2nd dropper

I fucked up my life kuch samaj nhi aa raha kya karu

( Keyboard ki wajah se typing mistake ho sakti hai )