Is it just me? Or is it you too?

I feel like I'm someone who easily gets hurt beyond repair. So much to the point where it affects my performance overall in just.. "life".

This is not about strength cause I'm stronger than ever with time. But the fact that I have to live pretending like all is good and do what has to be done while deep inside I'm hurting, feels really... cruel? Idk.

Venting does not help too in my case. Cause everyday I still remember what it's like to feel hurt.

I also keep feeling like I should cut off people forever whom I can't be myself with cause it is so tiring to pretend with.

I really wanna know how other people are making it out there. Cause distractions for sure don't work for me. Doesn't matter how many good movies I watch, how many places I go to, how much I focus on improving something of myself.... end of the day, my pain seems to stay with me. And this feeling sucks.