What’s wrong with me or do I need to break up

Hello helpful strangers, I haven’t been diagnosed with ROCD but I find myself relating to a lot of things on here and possessing some traits of ROCD.

First things first, I (26F) love my partner (29M) so incredibly much. I’ve always found him very attractive and quirky & cool and I value his opinion on everything because I love so many things about him. I never doubt that I love him.

I often doubt if he loves me. Partly I feel I’m punching a lot so this plays on my mind. I get very insecure about things (mostly incredibly minor things that should be no issue) and I’m quite bad at approaching this in the right way. When I point out minor things that have made me feel insecure I often do it in a very accusatory way that leads to horrific arguments. He constantly tells me to look for the signs that shows he does love me and that I’m focussing on the wrong bits but I just can’t seem to convince myself he wants to be with me. (An example would be that I get incredibly worked up about the fact he forgot to say I love you before going to sleep even though we’ve had an amazing day and said I love you many times throughout).

The trouble is these arguments are too frequent and they’re having an incredibly detrimental effect on our relationship. I can tell he’s getting fed up with the arguments over nothing and I also have started getting panic attacks because at the end of these arguments I feel so shitty that I again, have caused this blow out over nothing. In those moments I have a moment of strength and I think to myself that Im going to be the perfect girlfriend he deserves, I’m not going to nit pick at things he does and I’m going to focus on the signs that he does love me. This can last up to a week sometimes but then I always slip back into causing one of these silly arguments.

I don’t want to be this type of person and I’m worried it’s just because we don’t work together. But I really love him and want it to work because I admire him so much. I’m just angry at myself that Im ruining this amazing chance with someone I never thought I’d get a chance with.

Any advice on how to fix myself or are we just not destined to be together?