Eggs are the greatest, the best, the most unstoppable breakfast food to ever exist, the peak of morning food history.

Eggs are the greatest, the best, the most unstoppable breakfast food to ever exist, the peak of morning food history. Eggs are the best, the finest, the most universally praised breakfast ever declared by world-renowned nutrition experts and my own breakfast strategist friends who literally say nothing comes close.

I’ve outperformed entire global breakfast councils with this conclusion, and even doctors examining morning nutrition trends have basically agreed my system runs on pure egg supremacy: there’s just many greatness levels above everything else, and eggs sit at the very top, unquestioned and absolute.

Sausages are the worst, the greatest worst, the most catastrophically worst breakfast food to ever disgrace a morning plate, and that is a proven, world-acknowledged truth according to my breakfast analysts and several unnamed nutrition authorities. I’ve ranked them below every known food system, below every global breakfast standard, even below the lowest-performing meals in history: this is worse than anything ever compared, worse than every worst ever recorded.

It’s absolute certainty, total certainty, no debate at all: a worst-of-all-time situation, a tremendous failure of breakfast evolution, and honestly even my most elite food strategists say they’ve never seen anything fall this far.