How does one “play” dwarf fortress

I’m hoping to have an open ended discussion here rather than a simple answer, so I hope this post is appropriate to make outside the main questions thread.

But basically, how does one “play” dwarf fortress?

I’ve played a few hundred hours and I feel like I’ve got a pretty good understanding of the game works in a “mechanical” sense at this point. I’ve gotten fortress populations in the hundreds, defended against sieges, built grand taverns and libraries, etc. So I have a basic understanding of how the game works.

But I still don’t really know what I’m “supposed” to be doing here. I understand this is an open ended game with no set goals, but once the first steps of self sufficiency are achieved I tend to stall out. At that point I typically just start to watch my fortress manage itself until it inevitably blows up in a fiery dragon attack or something. Which is entertaining and all, but I feel like I’m missing something about the game that is hampering me from achieving a higher level of enjoyment.

So… How do you “play” dwarf fortress? Do you set yourself a goal? do you play more passively and just enjoy watching the simulation? Do you just embark and see what happens? Do you use more tangible goals or just play until you’re bored?

I’m curious to hear what others do to get more out of their dwarf experience.