I struggle to communicate with friends, family, etc and it won't stop. Why is this, what's holding me back???

You probably haven't, I only say I would because I'm more of an empathetic introvert. A teenager who is still trying to find out who the hell he is and what's his purpose in life.

Say you're friends with someone, you don't know them all that well, just that they're a school buddy, you're cool with each other and have no problems with each other. When you guys spark up a conversation you suddenly just shift back to reality. Now you're dragged out of the conversation by your own self-conscious. You realize "woah, I'm at school and talking to this cool dude, I'm doing really well as someone who used to be an introvert" you get back to the conversation and your mind just goes blank

"wait, why are we talking again?" now you don't know how to act. You realize you're in a situation of panic struggling to get your mind in the right place where you've progressed so far in life that I'm talking to all these people.

I can't snap back to reality after this. Now my mind is filled with thoughts. It's all over the place. Now the conversation is awkward. "just spout random bullshit" then I just start saying things out of context.

With a group of friends, it's even harder to cope with. I just go quiet and don't say anything, which really screws up my relationships. It's like something is pulling me back, and I can't reach past a certain extent to what I have already.

I feel like there is no solution, just that I overthink alot. Trying to remember who I am, trying not to get influenced and being myself helps a tad bit. Mind you I've had this mindset since I started high school, now I'm a grade 12 learner who feels left behind. All of this won't leave me alone no matter how hard I try to fix myself up.