34 M4F Looking for a true flirty connection

Okay, gonna be honest here, I'm in a quite of a slope lately. Been feeling lonely, insecure and kinda depressed(don't worry, I'm not looking for anyone to fix my mental well being, I've been around long enough to know not to look for that sort of stuff on the internet), and I want to have some positive connections in my life with the beautiful sex.

I'm a 34 year old virgin, I've never had a proper "girlfriend" before, mostly because I'm extremely introverted irl, and pretty girls make my knees wobble and my throat stiff. I am not a great flirt, but I really wanna be better... I want to know what it feels like to have a positive connection with a woman who I can talk to, openly, about my kinks, interests, and thoughts, and hear about hers.

The thing is, I've always been kinda ashamed of my kinks and fetishes, the only girls I've ever gone out with, I was never really brave enough to confess to them about my secret kinky side, which always made me a very tough person to get along with in a romantic setting. All my relationships ended very quickly, and none of them ever led to sex.

I know I might sound pathetic(if you'll check my post history, you'd probably realize that I have quite a bit of internalized love-hate relationship with feeling this pathetic... Idk if my life led me to being submissive or me being submissive made me lead such a life, but whatever it is, it is what it is) but I swear this isn't meant as a pity party, but rather an attempt of breaking free from old molds and curve a new way for myself to see myself.

I want to find someone fun, empathetic, compassionate and confident, who would be okay "taking me under her wing", sort of speak. You don't have to share my kinks, but if you do, it'd be somewhat more fun, I believe? I don't know, outside of rp, I never really did anything like this before.

My kinks are mostly tease and denial, chastity, femdom, edging, and femdom-related stuff. I guess it make sense I would be into that sort of stuff, considering the self deprecating introduction I just gave, huh? :P

Anyway, if you're interested, I promise to be an actual friend, if you'd have me. Someone you can play with, flirt with, explore with, but also someone you can actually talk to, someone who would actually care.

I don't know if this is the right place to seek out something like that, I ran into this sub by accident, but I thought I'd give it a try, what's the harm, right?