Eldest daughter rant !!

First of all if I sound cringe please don’t come for me 😭.

Sometimes my mum says things that makes me feel like I have no role in life other then being a parentified eldest daughter, therapist and a marriage counsellor. My parents always express how grateful they are to have a first born daughter and how they didn’t make a mistake having me if that makes sense (it would make more sense in Somali but I can’t write in Somali).

I’m the eldest of 7 and incredibly young myself and I’ve had to step up and do so much things from such young age. As soon as I learnt English I’ve had to translate everything for my mum like government letters and when I got older help her with government/council calls. I don’t mind doing this but when I don’t understand something or can’t translate it in Somali she says “you go to school, how do you not understand this” and it annoys me so much.

I’ve also had to take care of my siblings for the longest time ever and it’s not like my parents leave my siblings all to me but it’s the fact there’s so much children (2 with ASD) and they can’t handle them by themselves. At this point idk what point I’m trying to get across here I’m just tired and want to rant 💔💔.

Whenever I want to complain about school my mum tells me to not “stress her out” but I can’t do that when she wants to complain about whatever she wants like my dad. Also I’ve been fixing their relationship since I was 8 the amount of times they’ve argued and I’ve had to step in because if they get divorced my life’s actually over and I’ll genuinely have to stop doing everything and just help my mum even more

Moreover what I’m saying is I’ve never been praised for doing something good that’s not regarding helping them like if I do well in school I don’t get told I do well so I feel like I’m only alive to help them.

Sorry if none of this makes sense I’ve gotten so bad at writing