Should I send this hand written letter to my ex? we broke up a month ago

Allie,

I’ve been thinking hard about everything that happened between us, and I know I owe you a real apology — not excuses, not blaming, and not trying to rewrite what happened.

I hurt you in a lot of ways. I hid things from you, talked to other women on social media, and acted in ways that disrespected both you and our relationship. I know posting things online and messaging other women damaged your trust in me. I also said cruel things that made you feel judged and unwanted, and I deeply regret making you feel like you were anything less than valuable and deserving of love and respect.

I handled our fights badly too. Instead of staying present and working through things in a healthy way, I would leave when things got hard, and I know that abandonment hurt you. I also vented to other people about our private problems and shared personal things that should have stayed between us. That was disrespectful and unfair to you.

I know we both hurt each other during our relationship, and I know there was pain on both sides. But I want to be accountable for my part in it instead of pointing fingers. I can see now how my actions, my words, and the way I handled conflict made things worse and damaged the connection we had.

You deserved honesty, loyalty, patience, and kindness from me. Too many times, I gave you the opposite. I hate knowing that I made someone I cared about feel insecure, embarrassed, or unloved.

I’m not writing this to pressure you or to erase the past. I just want you to know that I recognize the hurt I caused, and I am truly sorry for it. I’ve been reflecting on the kind of person and partner I want to be, and I know I need to do better — not just say better words.

No matter what happens between us, I hope you heal from the pain I added to your life. And if there’s ever a chance for trust to be rebuilt, I understand that it would take time, consistency, honesty, and real change from me.

I’m sorry, Allie.

Love always,

Joe