I genuinely hate when abusive people “reach out” in the wrong ways.

I just realized that when I went NC with my step family they bothered MY aunt and MY other family members instead of asking their spouses to contact me (sure not the best way but it’s not MY FAMILY IM STILL IN CONTACT WITH WHO ARE INNOCENT AND HAVE NOTHING TO DO WITH YOU. Your spouse has something to do with you. Something as simple as “hey, it’s me **** ******. I don’t understand what happened but my wife/husband really wants to talk to you and make sure you’re ok and if there is something they can mend what they did in the past.”and that’s it.) or reach out in other ways like email, mail (people back at my old place would’ve let me know), etc. it’s like they were trying to put me in a spot to where “oh she will have to talk to us after we got her beloved family involved!”. Hell, they could’ve taken the message and I’d actually think “maybe NC was too much. Let me go apologize and maybe we can build this back up together…” but nope send me in a panic attack by getting others involved. Thankfully they knew the deal and said “I can block them if you want”(I said it was up to them.) Also Yes, they are still bothering them six months later. They’re not “worried” they’re just trying to keep their reputation together for everyone around them and trying to bother others into ME FIXING THEIR reputation after the “adopted one” left.

Same shit with another “friend” where they could still contact me via message to ask why I have stopped talking to them (after many incidents), or they can apologize for fucking me over, or they could’ve just taken the message and fucked off. I’d be thinking me slowly cutting them off was too far but low and behold it seems like my gut was right……. she now constantly bothers me notifications in the group, directed at me, trying to get me to talk. I never blocked you, take the discomfort and not try to play innocent? Man up. I’m not playing a high school game.

I don’t know. I feel like I’m seeing another layer of control from people I thought was innocently trying to reach out except I realize why I’d have a panic attack or become angry as to why they keep involving others to try to get in contact with me to “talk” (blame, scapegoat, and verbally abuse me until I submit). I feel very angry with this. People who aren’t bad dont try to get back into contact, they just understand and have moved on. I hope those people live a long happy life and maybe one day we can talk again but not the ones trying to involve others. They broke that chance when they did that.