Did coke (and other substances) cause my DB? Struggling for answers. TW - adultery, addiction

I (f/32) was engaged to my ex-fiance (m/41). It just ended recently.

For 2.5/3 years we had a dead bedroom. Early on in the relationship he was having health issues - heart problems and extremely high blood pressure. We spent a lot of time on the cardiology unit and at doctors. They ended up saying the left side of his heart wasn’t pumping properly- probably a birth defect. They also put him on 5 high blood pressure meds, and 10mg of citilopram for anxiety.

After this was sorted out in the first year, nothing changed. We would have sex once a year, usually after his Christmas party or at a camp out - always when he was drunk. We had many talks, fights and nothing ever changed. He wouldn’t do anything about it either. Finally he got so fed up of me trying to talk to him about it he just told me “this is the way it is and I might never be able to fix it, decide if you can live with it.” I stayed. Idk why.

He broke up with me early February saying I was mentally unstable, controlling, angry ect. I was blindsided. But what actually happened as everything came out in the wash:

He has been drinking 45-50 beers a week, PLUS if there was any other alcohol in the house - he couldn’t stay out of it. It couldn’t just sit in the cupboard. It would be gone within a day or two. So I stopped buying it. This is all I was aware of - and I was asking him to slow down on his drinking.

BUT WHAT I DIDN’T KNOW - was that he has being doing coke - in fact - he’s been doing 1-2g every other day when he drinks at night after I’ve done to bed - PLUS injecting 1ml of testosterone from his gym buddy every week AND popping “supermans” - street Viagra mixed with god knows what other shit.

AND - could never be bothered to fuck me or try to work on our DB. But - watching tons of porn and snap chatting girls sexting them for hours and sending them dick pics and videos of him jacking off. He would talk to ANY girl despite if he knew them or not. And the porn he was watching and things he was saying to these girls are like nothing I’ve ever heard of him saying to me. Very hyper-sexual and like - can’t get enough of them.

He cheated on me and fucked his/our friend. She was his friend first of 13 years. She was my friend too. She also works with him. I needed one more bridesmaid to even out our numbers for the wedding, so I asked her to be one because her and I had been becoming friends and she was his good friend. I was dumb. I didn’t know it but she has an OF and Pornhub accounts where she has 1000s of pictures and videos of her fucking dildos and fucking other dudes and drinking. Her theme is anime/hentai. She’s still posting almost daily and making new content even though they are together, and apparently they are in an open relationship and they can see whoever they want.

What I want to know is - was the coke and drugs the cause of my dead bedroom? Is this what it does to parters and to people’s sexuality? I’m trying to understand everything I’ve found out.