GF revealed she’s been faking orgasms and thinks we have a bad sex life, I had no idea :(

need advice - so basically me (24 newly out of the closet) and my girlfriend (27 been out her whole life) have been seeing each other for about six months, and last night she basically admitted she is faking orgasms majority of the time. And i also admitted that i am doing the same thing :(

We told each other the reasons - for me its a mix, some is down to the technique but it’s a main factor is that physically it can be very hard for me and i have both trauma and severe adhd so straying present enough to reach orgasm is a rare thing for me - I usually have to be very very drunk. For her she said that it’s mainly my technique due to a lack of experience and her being able to tell that I was faking it so she wasn’t all that interested back.

She told me that she could tell i was faking it - For me i had no idea she was faking it at all so this has come as a shock to me. She told me she has thought for a long time that we had a shit sex life, and she had not thought of our sex life as good - I (feeling like an idiot) thought we had a great sex life and even though i was unable to cum i still really enjoyed it. Before we met i was a stone top, and never really went on the bottom because of all the factors above, and she was also a top primarily. She used to always say that i fucked her good and that i was the best fuck ever and all that type of stuff but clearly she had been lying. She’s also talked badly about her past hook ups saying they couldn’t make her cum and stuff like that so now i’m worried i’m grouped in with those girls and she also holds that sentiment about me. She made one comment once that i was not as good as i thought which kind of brought the whole house of cards down and made me think like oh okay so that’s the truth then - and i am so beyond humiliated and embarrassed since i thought i was good in the bedroom which i clearly am not and she has made that clear. She still says she’s not faking it every time but i don’t know if i believe her i think she is on damage control. We had a conversation about the sex we had had that night and i asked if she had cum and she had said yes she promised and i was like i don’t believe u and she said she promised she did, this is after our conversation where we both admitted to faking it, an hour later when i asked her again if she had cum tonight she said no not once and both times she was faking it. Now i feel like i can’t trust her because she said she promised but obviously that was a lie. It’s obviously not a big lie but now in regards to all the other stuff i don’t feel like i can’t trust her in regards to this topic, im not sure what to do i feel physically sick to my stomach.

We talked it over and are both not going to fake it anymore and try to find a rhythm that works, she doesn’t want to fuck unless we both want to be fucked but it’s hard for me to cum and stuff so i don’t know how this will work, it’s very rare for me to be able to cum and now i’m worried we won’t have any sex life. It’s hard because i want to fuck her like all the time and ofc i let her fuck me those times too but as for wanting to get fucked it’s rare. Now i’m worried our sex life is going to be dead.

I’m also hurt because she’s said the first times we got together she faked it in entirety which feels so deceptive and embarrassing because she hyped me up and i obviously did not perform well but have spent all this time thinking i did. The shame and embarrassment is eating me alive i am so humiliated by all this, she has hyped me up a lot and had me thinking i was good all the while laughing to herself that i was not evidenced by two of her little comments where it kind of felt jarring when she indicated that i was not good at sex prior to all this. I had thought she was saying it to hurt me/neg me or knock me down a peg - she’s normally extremely sweet. which is also embarrassing because this whole time she’s been thinking this and having this over me, while i had no idea

I don’t know what to do in this situation and need advice because she is the love of my life and i’m kind of spiralling because what if she is lying about how much she loves me too. What do I do? How do i move on from this my feelings are destroyed…i’m also terrified she doesn’t love me how i love her but i don’t know if im being over dramatic. I cried and feel physically sick - Im not sure how to move forward

Any advice is appreciated :(

TLDR - gf admitted she has been lying that i’m good in bed and now i’m worried about the lying to me and that the relationship is over because of our sexual mismatch (both tops)