Beginning to question myself for the first time.

I have lived as an openly gay man for 3 years now. I’m 20 years old. Over the past couple months/year I’ve been in a horrible depression. I know it’s ridiculous but ever since watching the movie ‘I saw the tv glow’ it kind of maybe opened things up for me and the idea of a better, happier you existing somewhere inside you just really spoke to me. And then last week, I was just watching a simple video and there was this girl just in the background wearing a cute outfit and I loved her hair and just picturing myself as her made me cry. I’ve never had any thought of me being trans before but the thought of transitioning and the idea of living as girl makes me tingle and want to cry and explode. I am a 6’3 man with a beard and i can’t even picture myself as a girl but god I want to. I don’t know how to process what I’m feeling. Hopefully someone here can give me some guidance. I’ve just been reading about some experiences of trans people on Reddit and relating so much to some of the thoughts that they’ve had that it’s just..overwhelming me.