Late at adulting. Effed off after Highschool. AIO

I (33F) have worked straight out of high school. I graduated 2011. I began working with kids at a pre school and took a few child ed courses. I realized working with kids was not for me so I started working in an office and began learning/doing HR duties and Payroll. From there I got my certificate in HR Management. I applied for an HR assistant at a manufacturing company and got hired for accounting instead. I reported directly to the controller and did the payroll along with full cycle accounting. I worked my way up in the span of 6 years from an accounting assistant to a staff accountant to an accounting supervisor. My controller talked me into going back to school for a degree. So I started taking classes at the community college again. I left that company for more pay at another company which turned out to be a hostile disaster. Unemployed I went. With high depression, loss of a baby inside of me and 2 jobs later, I found an amazing stable job in 2025. I have been taking 1-2 classes every spring and fall but still have so far to go. I do want a bachelor’s degree. I probably wont have one until late 30’s. I thought I was pushing myself with working full time and taking classes at night. My bf thinks I can push harder. I am so hard on myself. I have been in trouble with the law in my 20’s and just really fell hard on my face all to pick myself up and start over. I paid my dues and I just want to feel happy. My bf (30M) is very successful and already has his degree plus a new job making over 100k a year. I think he deserves someone more accomplished than me. He says things to make me believe so. Sure, I am not a whiz but I try pretty hard to handle my own. You guys I feel like giving up. I am constantly feeling like I am not good enough. In my own eyes and the eyes of others. I feel emotions heavily and can never be smooth sailing. My weight is killing me as well. I am 220lbs but tall and curvy. I have been pretty much starving myself with one meal a fay for the past 2 months and lost 19 lbs. My bf asks me from time to time when was the last time I hit the gym. I am not stupid, I know I could use a work out. I am always fighting for what I deserve but I shouldn’t have to fight so hard. I am fucking tired. I really am. I want to just face reality and probably be single forever. Idk if my man will ever want kids with me. We fight a lot. I try hard af to do my best for everyone around me. I sm s happy loving person but I have so much sadness deep in me. We both live with our parents. I was on my own for 6 years but my landlord needed the house back so back to my folks I go. I just cant get ahead. Why do I feel so worthless?