The Traveller Woman

Recently connected with two women.

One through Hinge (34 F), and another my mom shared her profile with me through some WhatsApp group (35 F).

For simplicity sake, lets call the woman from Hinge Woman 1, and the one from WhatsApp group Woman 2.

Woman 1 - Worked in a banking firm. We had a brief chat on Hinge, and continuously she was questioning me about travelling, particularly travelling abroad.

Quite honestly, I've never travelled abroad, and told her the same thing. I told her I would be happy to go with my partner once I get married.

Then she started asking me if I don't get married, will I not travel abroad? I told her that in case that happens, I would probably join some travel group and go with them.

Then she told me I should have already joined a group and travel abroad, and not wait for getting married.

Now at this point, it seemed she was unnecessarily being pushy about travelling. I humbly asked her if it is mandatory to travel abroad? To which she replied Yes.

This got me thinking. I can understand she has a liking for travelling abroad, but what's with this neediness that everyone should have a similar approach in life.

As a man, there are multiple responsibilities that we need to cater to. Buy a home, buy a car, devote time to family, and you kind of get stuck in the grind. In such a life, travelling is not the only thing life is centred around.

I just politely told her that she should find someone who has a similar desire of travelling and probably marry that person and unmatched her.

Woman 2 - Worked in an IT firm. The moment we spoke on the call, her accent was very prominent. She spoke well in English, but her tone and accent was like someone who tries to show off while speaking.

Most of the things she spoke about was having fun, chilling, vibing with someone, etc. After a while, I briefly asked her if she had thought of building something together with her partner post marriage. She did not understand what I was trying to convey and asked me to rephrase my question.

So I asked her has she thought of any common goals that she wants to achieve along with her partner. To which she replied yes I want to increase my "passport stamps." It became clear to me that she was also into travelling. She mentioned she's going to Japan in May 2026 for 2 weeks.

I said great, I would also be happy to travel with my partner, however, has she though of any other common goal apart from travelling. To which she said I've not thought of anything else. Life hasn't gone as planned, so she never thinks of having a goal, and just goes with the flow.

These two conversations really got me thinking whether travelling is the only thing marriage is all about? Have women really lost the depth that is required to build and sustain a relationship? Has marriage become just an avenue of having fun and going with the flow?

I know many men, married and unmarried, who are indebted with loans and are striving towards building a better life for their families. The cost of living is rising with each passing year. Flats in metro cities are becoming unaffordable. And in such a situation, instead of being a true partner for a man, and building a life together, some women just want to have fun through marriage.