My fears are runing my life

!!TW mentions of vomit!!

I have a massive fear of germs, illnesses that couse vomiting and diarrea and just vomit in genural.

Iv had this problem for as long as i could remember as a kid it would just result to breakdowns and crying in my teens it went further and i carried hand sanitizer everywhere and would glen 20 the house if we had guest wouldnt use the bathroom untill they left and i could disinfect the whole bathroom i also wouldnt use toilets in public due to them being dirty amd didnt want to catch anything but now going into the my late teen and 20 its gotten way. Way. Way worse i have to have gloves wjere ever i go i dont take transport anymore i wont set my belongings down anywhere but on my own body i wont sit down anywhere in public anymore and if im in a situation where i have to the moment i get home those cloths come off i have to always take my shoes off before i step inside my house incase i drag germs in from my shoes i show the moment i get home even if i didnt sit anywhere or touch anything.

Its eating into my social life with my partner and our friends as i can bearly leave the house without freaking out i wont eat at resturants i dont trust due to fear of food contamimation or food poisining when i am able to go outwith them its awkward couse im walking around sitting in weird ways to make sure i dont touch anyone anything that might be contaminated.

This whole thing is completly taking over my life. Its not just effecting me eaither anymore i got so paniced stressed out and scared if been pushing my "cleaness" habbits on my mum and partner i feel horrible about it

I also miss the freedom of being able to go out withour being terrifed im going to get sick i dont leave the house anymore at this point but it dosnt feel safe here sometimes eaither esusslly when my mum has work.

I hate this so much i feel so alone and trapped in a endless cycel..